If you think that sex is no big deal once you’re married, then you might as well say that you and your husband’s retirement plan is just as unnecessary as the dirt underneath my shoe.
In other words, if you think that the lack of sex in your marriage isn’t an issue as far as your physical and mental well being, then you are DEAD wrong.
Which leads me to #3 from last week’s post, Top 10 Mistaken Beliefs a Smart Wife Must Let Go Of, and today I’m here to tell you that you are surely mistaken if you think that: LACK OF SEX IS NO BIG DEAL.
Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong (did i say wrong?) and here’s just a few reasons why:
1) SEX IMPROVES INTIMACY:
Regular sex and orgasms increases the “love hormone,” otherwise known as oxytocin, the same hormone which is released in a mother when she gives birth to her baby. Increased oxytocin has also been associated with a feeling of generosity. So if you OR your partner is feeling more generous, tender and loving toward each other, you can thank the love hormone.
2) HELLO SEX; GOODBYE PROZAC:
Research has shown that having an active sex life reduces depression and anxiety. Furthermore, having sex increases one’s self-esteem, so it would make perfect sense that regular sex created an all satisfying boost!
3) THE ULTIMATE NATURAL HIGH
When you reach orgasm, oxytocin (the bonding hormone) is released, and an amnesic effect takes over — which can last for up to five hours. Think of what you can accomplish in that 5 hours when you feel THAT good!
4) SEX IS A POSITIVE TRICKLE EFFECT
Regular sex rewires the pleasure part of your brain, so the more you do it, the more you want it. You can ultimately increase your libido AND the connection between you and your partner by the frequency of sex.
5) REDUCED STRESS
Lower blood pressure and overall stress reduction is a HUGE health benefit to having sex. A Scottish research study noted in the Biological Psychology journal that they found women and men who were having regular sex, showed better responses to stressful circumstances the other who abstained more from sexual intercourse.
Additionally, other research has found a link between partner hugs and lower blood pressure in women.
6) BETTER ZZZZZZZs…
And finally, the most sacred thing for so many people: SLEEP. Whether it’s anxiety keeping you up at night or feeling overstimulated from you day with the kids, regular sex will without a doubt, increase your ability to get into a delicious R.E.M. snooze. It’s simple: the oxytocin released during orgasm promotes sleep – PERIOD. And we all know that without sleep, we’re all a mess and without the foundation of proper sleep, diet, and exercise, the whole “cookie” tends to crumble.
Hmmmmmmm…I don’t know about you but I would think after reading the above that one can easily say that sex is not only a VERY BIG DEAL but most definitely…SMART.
Ready to get smart about your sex life? Then check out one of my past videos from last year called: Time to Get In the Mood (wink)…
See you next Tuesday for False Belief #4…
Is this you???
If the answer is yes, then check out my newest video from Your Tango’s “Ask an Expert” series where I address this very common issue among many couples out there…
CONTEST! CONTEST! CONTEST!
Don’t forget to enter this week’s CONTEST to win a free copy of Jenna McCarthy’s new book, “If It Was Easy They’d Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: Living With and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sex-Obsessed, Not-So-Handy Man You Married.”
Check out Jenna’s hilarious book trailer and order her book NOW!
Also, check out Jenna’s interview on the TODAY show where she talks about this genius book.
In this past Tuesday’s post I was thrilled to share with you all the book trailer for Jenna McCarthy’s new book, “If It Was Easy They’d Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon:Living With and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sex-Obsessed, Not-So-Handy Man You Married.”
To tell you that Jenna is one of the most hilarious female writers out there would not be doing her writing justice, so I took it upon myself to share with you all 10 questions I asked Jenna about marriage, husbands and her experience as a wife. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did:
(and don’t forget to sign up for our CONTEST where we’re giving away 2 of her books!)
Click here for our CONTEST details on how to win a copy of her new book OR you can pre-order it NOW!
To see more of Jenna, tune into the TODAY show on Monday October 3rd, so set your DVRs now!
When you said “I do,” you promised you’d stick it out no matter how sick, poor or miserable you got. Now you realize till death do us part is a really long time. Happily ever after? Perhaps a slight exaggeration…
The above quote was written by the hilarious author (and new friend) Jenna McCarthy whose book, “If It Was Easy They’d Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: Living With and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sex-Obsessed, Not-So-Handy Man You Married“ is available for pre-order NOW!
Trust me when I tell you that this author is H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S and to wet your appetite, check out below the book trailer as well as details on how to win a free copy of Jenna’s new book!
WIN A COPY OF JENNA McCARTHY’S BOOK HERE!
Send me a juicy, honest and/or hilarious answer to this question:
Which one of your husband’s “habits” have you learned to accept and live with?? (Hence you’re being SMART because we all have to pick our battles in marriage)
Seriously. That’s ALL you have to do! On Tuesday October 11th I will pick 2 random winners!
Want MORE chances to win? Well then, keep reading…
1) Follow me on TWITTER and RT this:
Want some healthy marriage laughs? Follow and RT @BeTheSmartWife to win a copy of @jennawrites latest new book http://bit.ly/odoyWW #BTSWcontest
2) If you have a blog, link back to this post and contact me via my contact form telling me you did so, with the link so I can find it.
3) On the “Be the Smart Wife” Facebook page, leave a comment there and tell me your latest SMART WIFE tip. Your single comment could win!
Good luck! Looking forward to reading all of your own marriage tales and laughs…
Come back on Friday to read one of the funniest Q and A’s between myself and Jenna McCarthy where she shares with us her witty and wise thoughts about marriage!
The below excerpt can be found all over the internet by an unknown author. Therefore, I cannot take claim for the brilliance of it, but it sure as hell is genius and it is a MUST for you all to read:
The difference between men and women…
Her Diary:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn’t say much. I asked him what was wrong; He said, ‘Nothing’. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn’t upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior I don’t know why he didn’t say, ‘I love you, too. ‘When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my caress, and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep – I cried. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else…
My life is a disaster!
His Diary:
Boat wouldn’t start, can’t figure it out, at least I got laid.
So the moral here is: He has a penis, and you have a vagina. He’s not you. He never will be. He doesn’t think like you. He never will. The End.
BE SMART and accept it.
image via worldcupblog.org
Has the title of this post intrigued you??
If not, then click on the video to hear my latest and greatest “Not So Smart Wife” confession…it’s a GOOD one…promise.
LAST CHANCE (for real) TO WIN ONE OF MY FAVORITE MARRIAGE BOOKS!!
For those of you who haven’t yet shared your comment from last month’s post about SEX, I’ve extended the contest ONE MORE WEEK (your comments have just been SO good that I want to make room for more) – check out the post DO YOU LIKE SEX and one lucky viewer will win a copy of the book, “How to improve Your Marriage without Talking about it”. Send in your comments by midnight this Friday July 15th and the winner will be notified the next day!
WHAT MEN WANT WOMEN TO KNOW: real quotes from real men…
Ladies, this is STRAIGHT from the horse’s mouth and my job is to share it with you, so here you go:
“You have no idea how uncomfortable it is for us to hold our farts in the early months of sleeping together…and a HUGE relief when someone finally breaks the ’sound barrier’…”
So there you have it…he really doesn’t expect you to be as perfect as you think…
But I know what you’re thinking: What the hell does the above quote have to do with “being smart”??
Good question and here’s my answer —-> When the above quote happens to you…be smart and don’t freak out…you’re human. The end.
image via ladybrain.com
LAST CHANCE (for real) TO WIN ONE OF MY FAVORITE MARRIAGE BOOKS!!
For those of you who haven’t yet shared your comment from last month’s post about SEX, I’ve extended the contest ONE MORE WEEK (your comments have just been SO good that I want to make room for more) – check out the post DO YOU LIKE SEX and one lucky viewer will win a copy of the book, “How to improve Your Marriage without Talking about it”. Send in your comments by midnight this Friday July 15th and the winner will be notified the next day!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh…
No, I’m not talking about a foot massage…I’m talking about something you should be doing every so often with your husband…ALONE…with NO KIDS…and yes, this video is a must watch for many of you:
And for those of you who haven’t yet shared your comment on last week’s post about SEX, well I’ve decided to extend the contest ONE MORE WEEK – check out last week’s post DO YOU LIKE SEX, and one lucky viewer will win a copy of the book, “How to improve Your Marriage without Talking about it”. Send in your comments by midnight this Friday July 8th and the winner will be notified the next day! And for those of you who’ve already shared your comments: THANK YOU, Ladies!!! You rock…I appreciate your comments immensely…
Yes….I am asking YOU!
Dear Ladies,
I have recently received inquiries from several men asking me explicitly, “Do women love sex as much as men?”
One of the more specific questions sent to me was the following:
“DO women love sex as much as men??!! Are some women REAL hot-blooded, while others are ‘ice queens’?! Or (GOD FORBID!!), do women just ‘put up with it’ to keep peace?! I’m very interested in what you have to say concerning this subject!!”
Sooooooo….this means I NEED YOUR HELP: please send in your comments, thoughts, and honest feelings about you and sex and let’s give these men the answers they need to better understand YOU!
And here’s a little PERK:
At the end of the week, I will pick ONE person’s comment – that person will receive (compliments of yours truly) a copy of the book, “How to improve Your Marriage without Talking about it” (yes, can you tell how much I love that book??) – So here’s the 3 ways to send in your comments:
1) Leave a comment on this blog post
2) FACEBOOK: Leave a comment on our facebook fanpage Be the Smart Wife
3) TWITTER: Follow Be the smart Wife on Twitter and send us a tweet about: Whether or not you like sex and why, followed by: #BTSWandSEX
Once I’ve collected all the comments I will anonymously share them with other media facets to help get the word out as well as share my findings here on my blog…
I NEED YOUR HELP LADIES TO SHARE YOUR TRUTH. Send in your comments NOW by one of the 3 ways above and you may be the lucky winner of one of the best marriage books out there!
If you’ve been spinning your wheels trying to figure out how you and your husband can increase your “sexy times” in the bedroom, well look no further and simply watch today’s video for the EASIEST TIP ever!
Hey ladies…WHO LIKES TO COOK?? Are you in the market for a brand spanking new KitchenAid Classic Plus Stand Mixer? If so click HERE to enter Her Channel’s contest – you may be the lucky winner - but click NOW as the winner will be picked tomorrow, Wednesday May 18th…Good luck to all of you!
